I write to you today from the 136th day of summer. The calendar may say September, the flannel pumpkins may have hit Target shelves, but here in good ole’ Austin we’re still baking in the heat. You see, summer and I have a bad relationship. Kind of like the bad relationship in this week’s film, 500 Days of Summer (Disc/Download). Eventually, you just hope someone will put us all out of our misery.
Starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt as Tom, and Zooey Deschanel as Summer, the movie relies heavily on colorful visuals, choreographed dance numbers, and omniscient narration to tell the story of a couple’s failed relationship. She says she’s not looking for anything serious, he doesn’t believe her, they date anyway, and he’s shocked when she dumps him. Then they kinda-sorta flirt again, before she’s suddenly married to another guy. Truthfully, Summer is…. awful. The woman likes Ringo Starr, for god’s sake. And with her high-waisted trousers, a-line dresses, and cute hair bows, her style is annoyingly perfect. So why do I watch this movie? A) because it’s an Anthropologie catalog come to life, and B) Tom. The man wears sweater vests without irony, he can turn an IKEA trip into the cutest date ever, and don’t even get me started on his drunken karaoke skills. He can do so much better than Summer.
You must understand– this is a very basic girl masquerading as someone unique. I imagine Summer would take a summer cocktail like the Aperol Spritz and make it in a new way, just because she could. Is it better? No. But using Campari instead of Aperol would make her seem cool and different. While watching this bitter take on modern love, I recommend drinking a Campari Spritz.
2 oz Campari
3 oz Champagne
Fill a glass with ice. Top with Campari and champagne, then fill glass the rest of the way with club soda. Stir gently to combine, and garnish with an orange wedge.
I come down hard on Summer (and summer), but it’s only because I don’t like being told how to feel about a character, or a season. I don’t want to be forced to like a girl just because she’s a snappy dresser, and I don’t want to be forced to like summer just because the rest of the country has a pleasant climate for 4-5 months. Let me have grey, rainy days, and strong, authentic female characters; summer is meant for someone else. Cheers!