Action/Adventure/Heist · Classic Films · Comedies

How to Steal a Million

Image Credit: How to Steal a Million, 1966
Image Credit: How to Steal a Million, 1966

I was in the mood for some vintage Peter O’Toole this week, so I went into my DVD vault to find one of my favorite capers. How to Steal a Million (DVD/Download) is everything one could want in a heist film- sparkling dialogue, stylish clothes and cars, a clever plan, and cheeky romance. For any classic film buff that thinks of O’Toole only as Lawrence of Arabia, prepare to meet funny James Bond.

In recent decades, art heist films have experienced enormous popularity, ie. The Thomas Crown AffairEntrapment, and Ocean’s Twelve. But surpassing them all in style and originality is How to Steal a Million. In this film, Audrey Hepburn is forced to steal her father’s forged sculpture from a Parisian museum before anybody realizes it’s actually a fake. She enlists the help of an art thief, played by Peter O’Toole, who devises a ridiculously clever scheme involving boomerangs, alarms, and Audrey minus her Givenchy couture. Along the way she’s courted by a creepy American businessman played by Eli Wallach, who wants the sculpture for his own unexplained, presumably perverse reasons. Aside from the wonderful script, this film features beautiful shots of 1960’s Paris, as well as maybe the cutest automobile in cinema. Always stylish, Audrey drives around in a little Autobianchi Bianchina sports car (a fancy Fiat 500), and I coveted it so much that when Fiat came out with the 500 Pop, I was first in line to buy one. Sadly, my closet is still missing some Givenchy.

For a classic heist film like this one, the cocktail has to be sophisticated and timeless. One of the most clever parts of the plot involves a boomerang, and without giving anything away, let’s just say the whole operation hinges on it. While watching How to Steal a Million, I recommend drinking a Boomerang.

Boomerang

1.5 oz gin

1oz dry vermouth

1tsp Luxardo maraschino liqueur

1 dash angostura bitters

Garnish: Lemon twist

Stir ingredients together over ice and strain into a chilled cocktail glass. Add a lemon twist.

Boomerang

The Boomerang cocktail first appeared in the Savoy Cocktail book as a whiskey-based drink, however bartenders are still making it today under a different iteration. I happen to like the gin version better myself, and I’ll take any excuse to use Luxardo maraschino liqueur (a new favorite- sorry St. Germain). If you’re looking for a great date night, this movie and this cocktail are it. Being trapped in a closet with cleaning supplies never looked so sexy. Cheers!

Comedies

Big

Image credit:  Big, 1988
Image credit: Big, 1988

This past weekend my husband and I decided to throw a children’s party for all of our adult friends. I was inspired by an ingenious episode of Difficult People wherein two friends turn a Manhattan bistro into a haven for adults who still enjoy eating like they’re five years old (see “The Children’s Menu”). I love this… so much. Why should kids be the only ones who get to eat pizza bagels and macaroni and cheese? Why can’t I have my PB&J and a cocktail too? Why does it have to be either/or?

A movie that fully embraces this concept of celebrating the kid in all of us is the Tom Hanks classic Big (DVD/Download). I consider this to be essential viewing within the Golden Age of Hanks, when this comedic genius actually made comedies. After You’ve Got Mail the man pretty much went down a Spielberg rabbit hole and never told a joke in cinema again. But back in the late 80’s, he was just a child, trapped in a man’s body, let loose on the streets of New York. After watching this movie, I’m pretty sure every kid in America aspired to one day have an enormous Manhattan loft with a trampoline and bunkbeds. I know I did. And come on, working for a toy company? Coolest job ever!!!! It saddens me to see the iconic piano scene with Robert Loggia in FAO Schwarz now that the toy store has closed its New York flagship. I remember when my mother took us as children, and I was too shy to get on the piano keys. Ah, regret.

I had to consult an essential book in my cocktail library this week, Kiddie Cocktails. Being married to a non-drinker, I’m always on the hunt for interesting virgin beverages. What I love about this book is that they have wonderful non-alcoholic recipes, which I can easily spike for myself. It’s a win-win for our household. While watching Big, I recommend drinking a Zoltar Zinger*.

Zoltar Zinger

8 oz ginger ale

1.5 oz vodka (optional)

¼ oz grenadine

½ oz lemon juice

4 dashes Angostura bitters

Build drink in a highball glass over ice, topping with ginger ale and stirring gently.

*adapted from a recipe for “The Chomp”, pg 45

Zoltar Zinger

I may have grown up and developed a taste for hard liquor, but gastronomically I never aged beyond seven. Maybe that’s why I’ve always loved Big so much. Tom Hanks is stuck in a world of uptight grown-ups, but he still just does his own thing and eats his baby corn like he’s at a 4th of July barbecue. And people kind of love him for it. So for all the healthy adults out there who want to serve me marinated Brussels sprouts or cauliflower steaks, thanks but no thanks. I’ll be over here in the corner with a plain cheese sandwich and a smile on my face. Cheers!

Dramas

Good Will Hunting

Image credit: Good Will Hunting, 1997
Image credit: Good Will Hunting, 1997

It FINALLY feels like fall outside, and I’m surrounded by apple spice/pumpkin spice everything. This time of year always makes me nostalgic for crunchy leaves underfoot and college co-eds in sweaters. I can think of no better movie to watch in autumn than Good Will Hunting (DVD/Download). So curl up with a plaid blanket, fix a drink, and prepare to be lulled in by a soothing Danny Elfman score and the timid songs of Elliott Smith. I feel like skipping class all over again!

Good Will Hunting will always be known as the film that made Matt Damon and Ben Affleck famous, as BFFs, actors, and screenwriters. It’s the Hollywood story everyone loves to hear- two childhood best friends write a script, Robin Williams decides he wants to be in it, Harvey Weinstein decides he wants to produce it, the film is made, released, it’s a big success, and the two best friends bask in Oscar glory. Of course, there’s probably a lot more to the story than that, but that PR-approved legend is just as heartwarming as the movie itself. I know this film about a young mathematical prodigy overcoming childhood trauma to find love gets criticized for being too saccharine at times (It’s Not Your Fault) but no one can deny the brilliant performance by Robin Williams as a down-to-earth psychologist, the charming Southie accents of Matt Damon and his crew of friends, or the perfect, weepy Elliott Smith soundtrack. It still kills me that “Miss Misery” lost out on the Oscar to Celine Dion and “My Heart Will Go On”. I demand a recount.

One of the best, and most oft-quoted lines of the film is when Matt Damon’s Will Hunting announces he got the number of a girl in a bar and, well, “how do you like them apples?” I’ve recently fallen in love with Argus Cidery’s Ciderkin hard apple cider, and I’ve been dying to use it in a cocktail. So while watching Good Will Hunting, I suggest drinking Them Apples.

Them Apples

1.5 oz Buffalo Trace Bourbon

1 oz butterscotch schnapps

3 oz apple cider

4 oz Argus Cidery Ciderkin

Build drink over ice, stirring gently to combine.

Them Apples

It’s still fun to watch this movie and see how incredibly young Matt Damon and Ben Affleck look. They’re major blockbuster stars now (in fact I just caught Matt Damon in the stellar film The Martian over the weekend), but back then they were just a couple of kids with some Kevin Smith film credits. And of course, my heart aches for all the Robin Williams performances we’ll never get to see in the future. This one is just so damn good. So bundle up, settle in, and if you need me- sorry guys, I gotta go see about a drink. Cheers!

Dramas

The Craft

Image Credit:  The Craft, 1996
Image Credit: The Craft, 1996

Behold the power of Manon! (Manault? Manot? Manoh? Sp.?) What The Craft (DVD/Download) lacks in God-title enunciation, it makes up for in 90’s grunge/emo fashions and alt-rock music. Halloween is coming up, and I really wish I had 3 other female friends eager to dress up as the ladies from this movie. However, convincing someone to willingly copy Fairuza Balk’s makeup style may cause irreparable harm to a relationship.

What I loved about The Craft as a teenager was not just the heavy use of eyeliner, but the idea of harnessing female friendship and using it to combat all those pesky adolescent problems. Sure, they’re witches (sort of), but they’re also just weird teenage girls. Eventually this film spirals into a pseudo horror-thriller with snakes and slit wrists, but in the beginning it’s all colored candles and Letters to Cleo songs. I know by the end of the movie we’re all supposed to realize how bad it is to cast spells against other people, but come on- who doesn’t want to play “Light as a Feather, Stiff as a Board” with Neve Campbell?

For my cocktail this week, I’m calling on the Four Corners to bring me alcoholic perfection. By Four Corners, I mean Vodka, Triple Sec, Lemon Juice, and Pomegranate. While watching The Craft, I recommend drinking a Blessed Be.

Blessed Be

2 oz. Vodka

.5 oz Triple Sec

.5 oz Lemon Juice

1 oz Pomegranate juice

Licorice (optional, for garnish)

Combine liquid ingredients in a cocktail shaker filled with ice. Shake until chilled, then strain into a martini glass. Garnish with black licorice (or any licorice if you’re still trying to use up some Halloween candy).

Blessed Be

In thinking about The Craft, I started to wonder what spell I would cast now if given the opportunity. Love is covered, I’ve given up on looks (after 30, it is what it is), and outside of politics, bullies tend to disappear after high school. That leaves power, but who wants that kind of responsibility? By the power of 3 times 3, I’ll simply say cheers, and Happy Halloween!

Dramas

The Aviator

Image credit: The Aviator, 2004
Image credit: The Aviator, 2004

I’m sure I’ve previously mentioned that I adore movies about old Hollywood. The glamour, the scandals- I can’t get enough. This week I’ll be watching Scorsese’s The Aviator (DVD/Download), one of the best films to feature re-imagined classic film stars. Cate Blanchett as Katherine Hepburn; Gwen Stefani as Jean Harlow; Kate Beckinsale as Ava Gardner- the list goes on and on. And yes, there is Leonardo DiCaprio as mogul Howard Hughes, but who are we kidding here- the ladies are the stars of this show.

The Aviator follows Howard Hughes’ career as a movie producer and aviation pioneer, his success overshadowed by a raging case of OCD. Hughes’ money and charm attract a cavalcade of beautiful starlets, but it’s Hepburn who really connects with him. I know, I know, she was meant to be with Spencer Tracy, but a part of me wanted her to end up with Howard Hughes. Cate Blanchett does Hepburn like nobody’s business, completely nailing the WASP-y New England accent and athletic stride. I was less impressed by Kate Beckinsale’s breathy portrayal of Ava Gardner, though of course I loved her costumes! Really though, the best part for me is the fabulous wallpaper in the bathroom of the Beverly Hills Hotel. That iconic giant palm-leaf design is a welcome distraction from DiCaprio’s sweaty overacting mess below it.

The 1930’s must have been an amazing time to be in Hollywood. Not just for the films (though those were good too), but also for the cocktails! Imagine sipping a gin cocktail at the Cocoanut Grove, a drunken Errol Flynn at the next table over, hitting on starlets left and right. Paying tribute to classic drinks and Hughes’ obsession with flying, while watching The Aviator I recommend drinking an Aviation cocktail.

Aviation

1 ½ oz gin

½ oz lemon juice

¾ oz maraschino liqueur

¼ oz crème de violette

Maraschino cherry (optional)

Add all ingredients to a shaker filled with ice, shake until chilled, then strain into a coupe glass. Garnish with a maraschino cherry (optional).

Aviator

Obviously, The Aviator focuses a great deal on Hughes’ aviation experience (including one harrowing plane crash over Beverly Hills), but it’s also a love letter to cinema. Watching the filming of Hell’s Angels is pure fun, and I love seeing how the coloration and technology of cinema changes over time. In short, come for the glitz and action, but continue watching for the style and history. Cheers!

Comedies

Singles

Image credit:  Singles, 1992
Image credit: Singles, 1992

Talk about a 90’s time capsule. Watching Singles (DVD/Download) is like curling up in a flannel shirt, putting on a Pearl Jam CD and sipping a tall Costa-Rican blend coffee from Starbucks. You can literally feel the grunge rock pulsating from the screen. Singles set the stage for other, perhaps better, movies and TV shows about a group of friends in their 20’s talking about relationships (ie. Reality Bites and Friends), but this film has something nothing else does. That’s right, I’m talking about young Eddie Vedder.

Singles follows the lives of several young attractive people all living in the same apartment complex in Seattle. They talk about dating, breast implants, calling vs. not calling, exes, music, etc. Basically, Melrose Place with an actually decent script. And, Matt Dillon has…. maybe the worst movie wardrobe I’ve ever seen.

I’m extremely tempted to make a Matt Dillon to go with this movie*, but I’m not that mean (though it would be pretty grunge). No, this week I’m paying tribute to that great Seattle export, coffee. Specifically, coffee shops where you can sit and talk for hours, or work on your laptop, and act like you’re doing something meaningful with your life. Seattle-born Starbucks has given rise to a whole slew of coffee-related beverages that, let’s face it, have very little to do with coffee. Pumpkin-caramel-soy-latte anyone? This week, while watching Singles, I recommend drinking a Caramel Macchiato Martini.

Caramel Macchiato Martini

1.5 oz Patron XO Café

1 oz butterscotch schnapps

1 oz white crème de cacao

2 oz half and half

Cinnamon Sugar

Rim a martini glass with cinnamon sugar and set aside. Mix Patron XO, schnapps, crème de cacao, and half & half in a cocktail shaker filled with ice. Shake until chilled, then strain into prepared glass. Put on some Soundgarden and contemplate wearing that pork pie hat in the back of your closet.

Caramel macchiato martini

What excites me to no end is the fact that director Cameron Crowe used young grunge newbies Eddie Vedder and Chris Cornell as musicians/actors in the movie. I’ve always had a bit of a crush on both of them, and my GOD Eddie Vedder looks so young. Also, kudos for the jokes about video dating – I love that this was once a thing, and I love that we can now watch these gems whenever we want: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0bomkgXeDkE . Thanks YouTube! And Cheers!

*for those not in the know, a Matt Dillon is the drink that bartenders offer you when you’re out of money. They take a well-used spill mat, fold it, and pour the contents into a shot glass. Bottoms up.

Dramas

American Psycho

Image credit: American Psycho, 2000
Image credit: American Psycho, 2000

Technically Literary Adaptation Month was supposed to end in September… but I couldn’t resist one more! American Psycho isn’t exactly a book you’ll find on your high school reading list, anyway (though it should be!). Based on the novel by Bret Easton Ellis, American Psycho (DVD/Download) is a horrifying, marvelous, and sharp tale about 1980’s consumer culture. With pop references on everything from Huey Lewis and the News to “Sussudio”, this film makes me laugh while simultaneously making me scared to ever walk down a dark street alone.

Lead character Patrick Bateman is played superbly by Christian Bale, who fought hard for this role. I fully admit that part of the appeal to this movie is his amazing physique, but past that, Bale does a great job of portraying the character’s cold-hearted disassociation, and later, panic over what he’s become. Director Mary Harron totally captures the New York 80’s era of excess, full of pin-striped suits, moussed hair, cocaine, and lunches at Café Des Artistes. I love that I can be laughing at Patrick Bateman’s obsession with “Hip to be Square” one minute, then cringing as he brings an axe down on Jared Leto’s head the next moment. What’s fascinating is that there are seemingly no consequences for crimes of the wealthy. Bateman can confess a love for murders and executions, and what people hear is his affinity for mergers and acquisitions. Brilliant.

Of course, one doesn’t become a serial killer without leaving little clues here and there. In addition to his disturbing notebook, Bateman keeps a closet full of corpses and has to explain away his bloody sheets to a skeptical dry cleaner. Sure, it’s cran-apple juice. Riiight…… While watching American Psycho, I recommend drinking a Psychokiller.

Psychokiller

2oz Deep Eddy Cranberry Vodka

.75 oz Calvados Apple Brandy

.5 oz Lime Juice

.5 oz simple syrup

1 oz hard cider

Fresh apple slice

Combine vodka, Calvados, lime juice, and simple syrup in a shaker filled with ice, and shake until chilled. Strain into a chilled martini glass.  Top with hard cider, and garnish with an apple slice.

psychokiller

Like Bateman, I too have an irrational fear of dining out without a reservation, and a love for fancy bath products. And yeah, I’m not crazy about cats either. But at least I don’t obsess over the quality of my business card. Yet. Cheers!

Classic Films · Dramas

Lolita

Image credit:  Lolita 1997 (left), Lolita 1962 (right)
Image credit: Lolita 1997 (left), Lolita 1962 (right)

Although it probably won’t ever make the required reading lists of any high school, I’m going to go out on a limb and say that Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov is one of the best books ever written. There, I said it. It was my favorite book as an adolescent, still my favorite in my 20’s, and even upon a recent re-reading, it remains a superb example of English prose. The sexual deviancy of the narrator (a man who preys upon teenage girls) would probably turn many people off, but they’d be missing the gorgeous linguistic skills of the author. “She was Lo, plain Lo, in the morning, standing four feet ten in one sock. She was Lola in slacks. She was Dolly at school. She was Dolores on the dotted line. But in my arms she was always Lolita.” Sentences like this are what have kept me championing this book for decades, and what keep me going as a writer. I’ll never be Nabokov, but one should always have a distant level of genius to aspire toward.

This book is so great in fact, that it took two film adaptations to really tell the story. Most people know of Stanley Kubrick’s 1962 Lolita (DVD/Download) with James Mason as the sophisticated, depraved Humbert Humbert, and I’m certainly a fan. I think it’s beautifully shot, with symbolic close-ups standing in for more gruesome scenes (I’m thinking particularly of the final showdown with Quilty) but it isn’t exactly an accurate adaptation of the book. It’s playful and light, almost a comedy. It captures the spirit of America that I think Nabokov was striving for, but it leaves out most of the emotion and depravity of the book. In contrast, Adrian Lyne’s 1997 version of Lolita (DVD/Download), was a very accurate adaptation plot-wise, nearly to the point of being too much to handle. I’m thinking again of the final showdown with Quilty, which in this version becomes a bloody, gory, gruesome mess- think Tarantino without the humor. However, Jeremy Irons is AMAZING as Humbert. Unfortunately I don’t think either Sue Lyons or Dominique Swain were altogether fantastic as Lolita, but both versions have wonderful Quilty’s, played by Peter Sellers and Frank Langella, respectively.

Whichever version of Lolita you prefer (and I really do suggest watching them both), I recommend harkening back to the novel for cocktail inspiration.  Humbert mentions his preferred drink, the Pin (pineapple juice and gin), so I’ll be enjoying that combination, with an added flirtation of champagne. While watching Lolita, I recommend drinking a Nymphette.

Nymphette

1 oz Gin

2 oz Pineapple Juice

1 oz Champagne

Lemon sugar for rimming

Rim a coupe glass with lemon sugar.  Combine Gin and Pineapple Juice over ice in a shaker.  Shake until chilled, then strain into prepared glass.  Top with Champagne.

Nymphette

You may notice in the above photo that I’ve got a copy of the Lolita audio book as read by Jeremy Irons.  If you’ve never heard it, go find it today (don’t worry if you already threw out your Walkman- it’s available on Audible or CD too).  That velvet voice is a perfect complement to Nabokov’s words, and I find myself getting lost in the beautifully crafted sentences. As poor, tortured Humbert Humbert admits, “You can always count on a murderer for a fancy prose style.” Cheers!

Top 5 Lists

Five Times Anne Bancroft was EVERYTHING

I’ve featured Anne Bancroft films a couple of times on Cinema Sips recently, and it’s made me realize that the woman is just amazing. Her style, her sense of humor, her way of elevating even the worst script- she’s a legend for a reason. In my 20’s I idolized Audrey Hepburn (doesn’t every girl have an Audrey phase?) but now that I’m a little older, I’m all about Anne Bancroft. Here are my five picks for when she was EVERYTHING.

  1. Mrs. Robinson, The Graduate
Anne Bancroft The Graduate
Image credit:  The Graduate, 1967

Leopard print for days. Those tanned, toned legs. That withering stare. How could Benjamin Braddock ever resist?

  1. Adele Larson, Home for the Holidays
Image credit: Home for the Holidays, 1995
Image credit: Home for the Holidays, 1995

Sure she wears unflattering winter coats and chain smokes in the pantry, but she’s still the mom that makes us want to come home for the holidays. And the bunion sneakers! I die.

  1. Glady Joe, How to Make an American Quilt
Anne Bancroft How to Make an American Quilt
Image Credit: How to Make an American Quilt, 1995

In the grand tradition of Anne Bancroft being the best thing about literally every crappy movie she’s in, Aunt Glady makes me smile as she sings along to Neil Diamond and gets high on the porch. And eats an astonishing amount of ice cream.

  1. Ms. Dinsmore, Great Expectations
Image credit: Great Expecations, 1998
Image credit: Great Expecations, 1998

She had me with the crazy eye liner and predilection for martinis. And then she went red. Even though her bedroom smells like cat piss, I still want to move in.

  1. Herself, Curb Your Enthusiasm
Image Credit: Curb Your Enthusiasm, Season 4, Episode 10, 2004
Image Credit: Curb Your Enthusiasm, Season 4, Episode 10, 2004

Iconic and chic right up until the end, it seems fitting that one of Anne Bancroft’s final performances was alongside her devoted husband Mel Brooks. Because love and laughter are the best accessories a woman can have. Although her pink gloves are pretty fabulous….

Dramas

Great Expectations

great expecatations dinsmore
Image credit: Great Expectations, 1998

I’ve thus far featured a couple of films during Literary Adaptation Month that have stayed pretty close to the source material.  This week however, I’ll be watching an adaptation that uses the original book as inspiration, but then veers wildly, excitingly off course.  A long-time favorite film of mine is Alfonso Cuarón’s 1998 version of Great Expectations (DVD/Download). Based on the novel by Charles Dickens, this film captures the classic Dickensian struggles of wealth vs. poverty and good vs. evil, while updating it for the modern era.

In the Cuarón version of Great Expectations, Pip is renamed Finn, and played by Ethan Hawke. A very bored Gwyneth Paltrow plays Estella, the focus of his unrequited love. Robert DeNiro’s portrayal of convict Lustig (Magwitch) is still a career highlight to me, and Anne Bancroft shines as Ms. Dinsmoor (aka Miss Havisham). I absolutely want to be Ms. Dinsmoor when I get old, sitting in a Florida mansion, drinking martinis, wearing crazy wigs and listening to Bossa Nova records. Strike that- can I just start that life now?? In this version, Finn becomes an artist (side note: I’m madly in love with the Francesco Clemente paintings and drawings done for the film), and Lustig’s secret patronage lures him to New York, and Estella. Great Expectations relies on visuals a great deal, and it’s this beauty (and the lovely words written by David Mamet in the voiceover narrations) that keep me coming back time and again.

A common visual motif in several of Alfonso Cuarón’s films is the color green. It’s been characterized as the color of hope, and in this film that could not be more true. Finn is always hopeful, even when he shouldn’t be. Cuarón seamlessly weaves the color into nearly every scene, through the lush tropical backdrops, Finn’s paintings, the costumes, and most notably in Gwyneth Paltrow’s TO DIE FOR Donna Karan dress. It’s so fabulous, I just have to share:

Great Expecations donna karan

For my drink this week, I’m picking up on that green motif and mixing up a martini that Ms. Dinsmore would surely be sipping in her gilded bedroom. While watching Great Expectations, I recommend drinking a Paradiso Perduto.

Paradiso Perduto

1 oz Midori

1 oz vodka

1 oz lemon juice

¼ oz simple syrup

Mix all ingredients in a cocktail shaker filled with ice. Shake until chilled. Strain into a chilled martini glass. 

Paradiso Perduto

I’m not usually one for radioactive-looking cocktails, but this one is actually quite tasty.  And with such a visually-focused film, why not match it?  There have been other Great Expectations adaptations, and I expect there will be several more in the future, but this one will always be special to me.  Modern art, martinis, and Donna Karan-  what’s not to love?  Chicka-boom!