I used to think my biggest fear in life was birds. The claws, the beaks, the unpredictability: all of it nightmare fodder.

Then came Birdfy.

Thanks to this incredible technological advancement, I now have a tiny camera in our backyard owl house which produces content more interesting and engaging than most of the Best Picture nominees. Have I officially entered my birding era?? One final test remains: watching Alfred Hitchcock’s The Birds (Disc/Download) without covering my eyes or hiding under a blanket.

Without Tippi Hedren’s iconic green suit, I might not have given The Birds a fair shot. But the Edith Head design is pure 1960s perfection, so I guess I can suffer through avian attacks in the name of fashion. Thankfully, Hedren doesn’t change her wardrobe for basically the entire movie. Don’t get me started on what kind of wacko buys a pair of lovebirds for a man she just met in a pet store, drives them sixty miles to his house on the coast, BREAKS INTO THE HOUSE to leave the birds, then decides to stay in his ex-girlfriend’s guest room without so much as a change of underwear. Like, what was the plan here??? This woman is wild. I’m not sure if her mere presence sends the local birds into a tizzy, or if it was the adorable green lovebirds (were they jealous of the flamboyance? mad about the gilded cage?), but something makes them want to commit murder. Hitchcock does a great job of building tension before each attack, starting with one bird, then two, then ten, then suddenly fifty or a hundred. They arrive faster than anyone expects, leaving the humans utterly defenseless. Tippi and her doomed green suit never stood a chance.

Brandy seems to be the liquor of choice for the shell-shocked residents of Bodega Bay, and there’s something lovely about the idea of snuggling up next to a fireplace in Northern California with a warming glass of spirits… as long as that fireplace doesn’t become an entry point for hundreds of murderous sparrows. While watching The Birds, I recommend drinking this riff on the Jungle Bird, the Bodega Bay Bird.

Bodega Bay Bird

2 oz brandy

¾ oz Campari

¾ oz simple syrup

1 oz lime juice

1 oz pineapple juice

Pineapple leaves (garnish)

Combine all ingredients except leaves in a shaker with ice. Shake well to chill, then strain into a glass filled with fresh ice. Garnish with more crushed ice on top, and pineapple leaves.

I’m happy to report that my eyes remained open throughout this entire movie, even during the horrific scene where Tippi is pecked and scratched by live crows. Maybe it’s the fact that my nervous system has already been completely destroyed and desensitized after fifteen months (and counting) of American fascism, but somehow, a bunch of birds doesn’t seem that scary anymore. The owls picked a perfect time to move in. Cheers!

NOTE: If you’re a fan of physical media, I highly recommend this Alfred Hitchcock box set. It’s a great collection at a very reasonable price, and you’ll never again have to rely on the whims of tech oligarchs to watch your favorite Hitch flicks!