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Tag Archives: Salty cocktail

Splash

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splash

Image credit: Splash, 1984.

I know I’m supposed to care about modern underwater extravaganzas like Aquaman, but the truth is I’ve never gotten over my first deep-sea movie love:  Splash (Disc/Download).  Even The Little Mermaid pales in comparison to this delightful Tom Hanks/Daryl Hannah rom-com about a man who falls in love with a mermaid.  Funny and charming, with some pretty impressive fishtail effects, this film is a sea fantasy come to life.

When I was young, I totally wanted to be Daryl Hannah.  Alas, all the Morton’s salt in the world couldn’t turn my legs to scales and my hair into a soft, flowing nest of crimped perfection.  As mermaid Madison, she learns English in a single afternoon by watching daytime TV, goes on a Bloomingdale’s shopping spree, and somehow learns how to ice skate despite the fact that she’s never seen ice before.  Plus, she makes the wise decision early on to fall for Tom Hanks.  He’s the kind of guy who offers to get her a hotel room, even after she’s slept with him, because he knows their afternoon delight DOESN’T AUTOMATICALLY OBLIGATE HER TO DO MORE.  He’s the kind of guy who keeps fish tanks in every room because he’s never gotten over the mermaid who saved him as a little boy.  And he’s the kind of guy who will give up a lifetime of John Candy’s jokes for his one true love.  This man is a keeper.

Speaking of John Candy, he plays Hanks’ off-color, sleazy brother with a schlubby, good-hearted charm.  Sure he’s a walking sexual harassment lawsuit, but he also dispenses wisdom like, “Drinking is a matter of algebraic ratio.  It’s not that you had too much to drink; it’s that you’re too skinny.”  SO TRUE.  While watching Splash, capture the flavor of the ocean with some Himalayan Salt shot glasses, and this tasty cocktail:

SALTWATER SHOT

2 oz Citron Vodka

1 oz Orange Liqueur

1 oz Lime Juice

Lime Wedge

Combine vodka, orange liqueur, and lime juice in a shaker with ice.  Shake until chilled, then pour into Himalayan Salt glasses.  Garnish with a lime wedge.

saltwater shots

Rumor has it this film is being remade with a gender swap, but I’ll always love the original because it celebrates a mermaid who doesn’t have to change herself to fit into a man’s world.  Her world is pretty awesome already, and if a guy wants to be with her, he’s just going to have to hang out underwater and kiss her constantly for the rest of his life.  Now THAT’S a happily ever after.  Cheers!

Waiting for Guffman

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waiting-for-guffman

Image credit: Waiting for Guffman, 1996

I seriously cannot contain my excitement for the new Christopher Guest film Mascots (releasing this week on Netflix). What has me even more excited is that fact that Guest is reviving his greatest character, Corky St. Clair from this week’s film Waiting for Guffman (DVD/Download). I thought I knew funny when I saw Best in Show….. but then I saw Guffman. To this day, no other movie has made me laugh as hard. I think it’s high time for a repeat viewing. Everybody Dance!

Being someone who personally cringes at the idea of musical theater, it’s always a joy for me to see a movie that mocks those who take it so seriously. No theater troupe is quite as pathetic as the local group seen in this movie. Uncoordinated, cross-eyed, delusional, they still believe that a hot shot producer will see their play Red, White, and Blaine and bring them to Broadway. Because that’s what every New Yorker wants to see- a musical about a crappy town in Missouri (literally- their claim to fame is a stool boom).The casting session is not to be missed, nor the choreography work in Corky’s apartment. And as the cherry on this absurd crown, Red, White, and Blaine toes that perfect line between absolutely ridiculous and surprisingly kind of…. good (even if there is no swimming in the show).

Legend has it that town founder Blaine Fabin was looking for California, but after detecting the scent of salt water he mistakenly settled in Missouri. Obviously, there was a lot of hubbub over this salt water. Salt has become a trendy ingredient in cocktails, balancing out the bitter flavors of some drinks in a really interesting way. While watching Waiting for Guffman, I recommend drinking a Salt Water cocktail.

Salt Water

1 oz Gin

¼ oz Amaretto

½ oz lemon juice

1 tbsp apples, diced into small pieces (+ 1 slice for garnish)

Pinch of Fleur de Sal seasalt

Prosecco, chilled

Muddle apples and salt together in the bottom of a champagne flute. Then add lemon juice and muddle further. Add the gin and amaretto. Top with prosecco, and garnish with an apple slice.

saltwater

Guffman was the start of Guest’s collaboration with many of his now-regulars (such as Parker Posey, Fred Willard, Catherine O’Hara, Bob Balaban, Eugene Levy, etc.) and I’m so happy to see most of them returning for Mascots. If Corky hasn’t found Broadway success yet, well I’m just goin’ home and I’m gonna bite my pillow. Cheers!